So one of the employees of "American Idol" is claiming that the show's rigged? Why, of course it is! I could have told you that! And I have solid, 100% trustworthy proof to back it up.
During last night's show, I hacked into the "American Idol" mainframe--using the powerful hacking skills I learned during COMP101, of course--and awarded myself a million billion votes. But when the eleven finalists were announced, guess who's name wasn't there?
No, guess again.
No, still not right.
Yes--me! Hey, "American Idol," I cheated fair and square! I deserve a place in the winner's circle! What sort of world are we living in, when cheating isn't enough to win you instant fame and fortune?
For the curious, here's the song list I had lined up for my appearance:
-"I Don't Know How to Love Him"
-"In-a-Gadda-da-Vida"
-"Revolution #9" (for Beatles Night)
-"I Am the Very Model of a Modern Major General"
-" 4'33" "
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