The New Jersey Institute of Technology: Their 1-28 record is unimpressive, but they hope to sway the selection committee by arguing that "it's Opposite Day today!"
Michigan: Though they tout their 33-0 record, critics point out that they enjoyed an extremely easy strength of schedule, as all 33 games were played against their JV team.
Louisville: They did win the Big East regular season and conference tournament; but clearly, the Big East wasn't as tough as we thought it was--after all, Louisville was able to win it.
North Dakota State: The selection committee has begun to suspect that NDSU may have fabricated some of their tournament resume, especially the part where they claim to have beaten "Pitt, UNC, UConn, the LA Lakers, the Cleveland Cavaliers, and the Dream Team."
Alabama: The Crimson Tide point out that their fans repeatedly cheered them on during the season by shouting "We're #1!"; who can you trust, if not your fans?
Duquesne: Praying like hell that all 187 teams ahead of them lose sometime before 6 o'clock this afternoon.
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