Level One: Playing video games
Level Two: Spending more than two hours a day playing video games
Level Three: Playing video games until your eyes hurt
Level Four: At this level, you can't feel your thumbs anymore
Level Five: You begin to sound like Mario whenever you talk
Level Six: You start dressing like Mario, too
Level Seven: Spending less than two hours a day NOT playing video games
Level Eight: You plan on naming your child Link...assuming you ever get a child, which is impossible, because at this point you only leave the TV in order to refuel your bowl of Cheetos
Level Nine: This
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