Where's New Coke?

The NY Post takes on the rather lofty goal of cataloging "History's 10 Biggest Disappointments." Now that's a toughie. As a history major, I feel confident in telling you that history is one disappointment after another. And then you die--painfully, usually skewered on something.

I can't really quibble with the Post's picks--the Segway, Star War: The Phantom Menace, William Henry Harrison--both because they seem pretty reasonable and because I hate the word quibble. If "quibble" were a person, I'd do my best to beat the ever-loving hell out of him.

I can add a few of my own:

Ryan Leaf--And sadly, he's the best thing to come out of Washington State University.

Smell-O-Vision--You know what I wish? I wish Smell-O-Vision had lasted a little longer, so that it could be used in shows like "Bones" and "CSI." Or, best of all, "Cold Case." Nothing quite like the smell of somebody who's been crammed inside a crawlspace since the Fillmore administration!

The Vietnam War--Sure, everybody said it was going to be World War III, but it turned out to be not much more than Korea II.

King Kong--I've made claymation movies in my backyard that were better than this bloat-a-thon. And I don't call it a bloat-a-thon because Peter Jackson and Jack Black were prominently involved (zing!) I never thought I'd say this, but "My God! How many dinosaurs can one giant gorilla fight?"

Slinky--Yeah, it was pretty succesful. But it could have been more succesful.